


Seaside Improvisation

by SandraMorningstar



Category: The Borgias (Showtime TV)
Genre: Canon Divergence, F/M, Fix-It, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-24
Updated: 2018-12-24
Packaged: 2019-09-25 14:45:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17123351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SandraMorningstar/pseuds/SandraMorningstar
Summary: Her love for Paolo and her unborn child wouldn’t count for anything – neither before her father nor the rest of the world. To them, her actions had disgraced her and her firstborn would be nothing but a bastard. That was what Lucrezia thought after her escape from Pesaro, when she decided to strike out alone, looking for the happiness her sheltered life had never managed to provide her. But in the end, what she had always believed, still remained true: Only a Borgia can truly love a Borgia. And only once reunited with her brother does she find what she is looking for.





	Seaside Improvisation

**Author's Note:**

  * For [EllaStorm](https://archiveofourown.org/users/EllaStorm/gifts).



> Merry Christmas, Ella!
> 
> I hope you will enjoy this little story. It is a bit rough around the edges, but I hope the idea at the core of it will be good enough to smooth that out a bit.
> 
> This fic fought me a lot. It started as a story from Cesare's POV and the switch to Lucrezia's side of things was very much last minute. But it finally made the story work (yay!). I hope you don't mind too much that thanks to that change, our beloved leather-clad Renaissance badass has less screen time than you might have hoped for or expected. 
> 
> But enough of my ramblings and excuses. I hope you will enjoy reading this. 
> 
> Love, Sandra

\------------

_As you wish. My word is my word._  
We shall run away. Change our names, perhaps.  
Live out our days in some small fishing village by the coast.  
Where no one will guess who we once were…

\------------

 

Three days ride from Rome, Lucrezia had the sudden realization that she dreaded her return. Not least of all because she was with child now. The pregnancy might have come as a surprise to her but she didn’t need Giulia and her world-wise ways to know the consequences. Her love for Paolo and her unborn child wouldn’t count for anything – neither before her father nor the rest of the world. To them, her actions had disgraced her and her firstborn would be nothing but a bastard. A child raised far from prying eyes and bought a reasonably high-ranking position in the military or the Holy Mother church as soon as he came of age. If he didn’t become a convenient pawn in her father’s schemes as well. The thought settled in the pit of her stomach, bitter and aching like poison, and for a moment she wished it were; wished she could die right then and there. But she was a Borgia and her will to fight and thrive even in the face of adversity quickly triumphed.

She looked over to where Giulia was fast asleep in her bed and quietly got up. Her breath held, she dressed herself and gathered as much of her belongings as she could without risking to make too much noise.  
After she managed to slip out of their room unnoticed, getting into the stables was almost too easy. Saddeling her horse cost her some time as she’d rarely done it herself and didn’t dare to light one of the lanterns. So, in almost complete darkness, she worked until both saddle and reins were in place. She led the horse outside, her hood drawn as far down as it would go to hide her face, and rode off into the night.

It had very much been a spur of the moment decision but the farther she got from Rome, the more certain Lucrezia was that it had been the right one. An exhilarating feeling of liberation and levity took hold of her. She was free and whatever happened next, it was her choice.

 

* * *

 

Of course, some things were much harder now that she was on her own. A woman travelling alone was never truly safe and while the Borgia name had always attracted trouble like a flame attracts moths, it had also granted her safety. And, among other things, money. On the road, she quickly ran short on coin.

She sold what little valuables she had when she came across a pedlar and accepted his offer even though she knew the price he told her was far below the actual value of the pieces. But she didn’t want to draw attention by haggling with the man.

When she reached the next town, she washed her clothes meticulously and went to the tailor early the next morning. The shop was simple, but well kept and the owner, a friendly older man, made her a good price for the two simple dresses and the woollen travel coat she bought from him. He also agreed to buy the dress she had worn since her escape. It wasn’t in the most pristine shape anymore and Lucrezia was well aware that he was doing her a favour in taking it.

 

A few weeks into her journey, she realized she was getting close to the border and it occurred to her that she had no idea where she was headed. All that had been on her mind until now was to stay undetected and put as much distance between herself and Rome as she could. She tought about her family, then. About Cesare and Vanozza, who were probably worried sick about her, and about her father, who she missed terribly despite still being angry at him for marrying her off for political gain. She felt terribly lonely all of a sudden and, overwhelmed by emotion, she started crying.

Not wanting anyone to see her unbridled emotion, she directed her horse off the road and into a small forest. There, in a small glade, she allowed herself to truly break down. She sobbed until her throat felt hoarse and the tears stopped coming. The outburst had made her feel better but it had also made her realize how torn she was. Part of her wanted nothing more than to go home and be with her family, while the other wanted to keep running. And she had not only herself to think about, but her child as well. With a small smile she caressed her belly, vowing she would make sure her child would know the happiness that had eluded her so often.

“Milady”, a gruff, raspy voice said from behind her.

With a gasp, Lucrezia was startled to her feet and whirled around. Her fear subsided somewhat when she recognized Micheletto, her brother’s confidant. Only to rise again when she realised what his presence here meant.

“Please–”, Lucrezia said imploringly. “Please, do not force me to go back.” She was crying agin.

Micheletto raised his hand in a calming gesture. “I am not here to take you back to your husband. Cesare sent me to–”

“I can’t go back to him either”, she burst out before she could stop herself. She sank to her knees, wrapping her hands around herself.

There was a long pause, then Micheletto knelt down next to her. “Cesare is worried sick about you. All he cares about is your return.”

“I know”, she admitted, voice quiet. “But can he promise me I will not have to go back to Giovanni? Will he stand up against our father, if he decides I am needed to secure another political alliance?”

“I’m sure he will do everything in his power–”

“That is not enough!” She got up again. “I am with child.” She lowered her head. “It’s not Giovanni’s. What am I to say to my parents when I return? How am I to look my father in the eyes once he knows? What if they hate me for what I did? I know I wasn’t supposed to, but I was so lonely. And what will become of the child? They will force me to give it up. You know that as well as I do, Micheletto. I will never see my child again and be forced to smile and bear it. Act like I never had one. Marry again, if my father wishes it so. Obey my husband, bear his children.” Her speech had gotten more and more enraged and now she was almost shouting. “I don’t want any of it. I want to see my child grow up. I want to marry someone I love, for no other reason than that I love him, and he loves me. I want to be happy. Live somewhere far from politics and anyone who’s ever heard the name Borgia.”

Micheletto had listened to her outburst without betraying his thoughts. Now he said: “That changes things. Cesare sent me to bring you back, but as things stand, Rome is hardly the best place for you. But neither is out here on the road.”

“I have nowhere else to go”, Lucrezia said ruefully.

“I will find you a place”, Micheletto promised. “And someone to take care of you and help deliver the child, once the time comes.”

“And what will you do?”

“Return to Cesare and tell him what I know.”

“Only him?”

“Only him”, Micheletto confirmed with a nod. “You have my word on it.”

 

* * *

 

Lucrezia screamed. The pain was excruciating and the ministrations and calming words of the midwife were little help. Only her continued assurances that she was doing great and the hope that this would all be over soon managed to keep her staying strong.

Then, a different cry mingled with hers. Strong lungs announcing their arrival to the world. The midwife swaddled the child in a blanket and handed it to her. She cradled it gingerly in her arms, looking at her firstborn with admiration and joy.

“It’s a boy”, the midwife said. “Do you have a name for him yet?”

She nodded tiredly. “Mateo”

“Ah, what a lovely name. A good name for a strong boy.”

The door burst open and Lucrezia gasped in shock, holding Mateo close to her. Then, her face lit up when she saw Cesare who immediately rushed to her side.

“Lucrezia!”, he pressed a gentle kiss onto her forehead. “I came as fast as I could. I am so glad you’re alright.”

“I missed you”, Lucrezia said, choked up and teary-eyed.

Cesare kissed her once more. He turned towards Micheletto and advised him to pay the midwive and accompany her to fetch the priest, who would baptise the child.

“You won’t harm her, will you?”, Lucrezia asked once they were alone.

“No”, Cesare assured her earnestly. “Micheletto trusts her, so there’s no need. Besides, I am in her debt for making sure you and your child are healthy.”

“But what will happen to us now?”, Lucrezia asked and barely dared to look her brother in the eye. “I can’t give him away. I would never be happy again, if I had to.”

“You won’t have to”, Cesare assured her. “After I heard what you told Micheletto, I knew I couldn’t bring myself to make you return with me.”

“Then tell me where else I can go. I don’t know anybody who I trust enough to keep my secret.”

“You know me, do you not?” Cesare smiled.

Lucrezia mirrored his expression. “I do and I would trust you with my life and soul.”

“Good”, he replied. “Because I made a decision in coming here. I chose you.”

“What do you mean?”

“I had no quiet moment since you married and left my side. I worried and when I found out your union with Giovanni was such an unhappy one, I wanted to slice him in half for making you miserable. When Giulia revealed that you ran away, I was heartbroken … but I understood why you did it.” He sighed deeply. “So, by the time Micheletto delivered the happy news that he’d found you, I’d already made up my mind: I will not let anyone make you unhappy again. No matter what it takes, I will see to it that from now on your life knows more happy days than sad ones. That is my promise to you.”

“But where would we go?”, Lucrezia asked. “Where can two Borgias live happily and in peace?”

“Somewhere where no one knows who we are”, Cesare said. “We will find a place. And we will build a life there. One that isn’t governed by politics and intrigues.”

“Thank you”, Lucrezia breathed. It didn’t begin to express her gratitude, but that was alright. She had a life ahead of her now. That was more than enough time to show him how happy he’d made her.

 

They ended up back in Spain, in a small fishing village. They bought a plot of land from a farmer and Cesare, together with some local men, built them a home. It was simple, but Lucrezia didn’t mind. Through her travels, she was weaned from the splendour of her former life. Cesare found work as a fisherman. Lucrezia befriended the local wise woman, Maria Fernanda, and soon became her apprentice. She learned to make remedies and grow herbs. And most importantly: She saw Mateo grow up, witnessed his first word and his first unsure steps. She spent many afternoons watching Cesare teach Mateo how to swim. Then, she looked out towards the horizon and saw her life stretch before her, a beautiful procession of bright and peaceful days, and she was happy.


End file.
